Boys and Technical Theatre Stuff

Now this sounds just plain wrong but I am learning that boys and technical theatre 'stuff'...just don't go together!!

We are in the theatre this week and what a week its proving to be. The first run throughs have been fraught with technical difficulties as we discover exactly what it was the directors intended when they blocked a particular scene. I have had to take off my costume 'hat' and put on my stage manager's 'hat' now we are in technical run mode. The poor kids in the cast are confused by the change in role and as I stand with my headset on, squinting at the script with my inadequate glasses and frantically peering around trying to see if the stage crew (I'll come to THEM in a minute) have cleared the stage ready for the light cue, they come up to me half dressed and say things that costume coordinators love to hear. Things like 'Do I have a costume for this scene?' or
'Will this (indicates totally unacceptable article of clothing which fails to meet any of the specified criteria) be alright for the Finale?'

I have been palming them off on my saintly assistant, Mrs Jones. A mother of one of the cast, she has been invaluable throughout this process and continues to work miracles in the dressing room with my sewing machine, scissors, an iron and a packet of pins. I think we have just about got everyone dressed bar a few shoe issues. One of the girls who is supposed to be a Neo-Nazi or a punk or something was horrified when I suggested she wear my husband's old leather boots with thick socks. Honestly, they're only a size too big and will be ok once I put some shoelaces in them!!!! She doesn't look very threatening in a leather jacket and bare feet. These kids are just not willing to sacrifice things for their art like we were at their age!!!!!!!!!!! :-)

But back to boys.

Our tech crew are drawn from the ranks of the AV class. These are the boys who love to play with PhotoShop, create powerpoints and music video clips and play fantasy games. They are SO into their computers that the idea of sitting waiting for a cue is unthinkable and they use the time in between cues to 'improve' the slides for the backdrop or 'loop' a sound effect...or even search the internet for a better sound effect/ slide!!

The backstage crew are drawn from the ranks of the 'this sounds like a good way to get out of a week of school' class. On the first day they stood around in the wings playing cards and looked very put out when anyone asked them to move anything...a finger for example. In fact if asked to do anything at all they looked at each other and a, "Who wants to do it? Do you want to do it? No I'll do the next one.", conversation ensued. I recall berating one of them who seemed oblivious, the reason becoming obvious when he pulled an earphone out of his ear and said "Huh?" New rule, no mp3 players backstage!!!!

But the classic is 'intercom protocol'. For those unfamiliar with backstage work, the stage manager, lighting staff, a/v operators, conductor and sound desk are all on headphones. We are thus able to communicate with each other from our various locations around the theatre and, theoretically, coordinate a smoothly running show. Theoretically. On the first day I donned my headset and said,
"Stage here, do I have lights? Can you hear me lights?" The girls responded with appropriate 'yes we're here noises' and I explained that the SM needs a response when I ask anything
so that I know they can hear me. When I call them to stand by a cue, they need to acknowledge me so that I know we are good to go. OK they responded, 'standing by'.....

Now, "Sound, are you there?"
"It's Reggie here."
"Good to know but can you just respond to 'sound' and acknowledge when I ask you anything?"
"OK."
"A/v are you there? A/v? A/v............!!!!!"
"I don't think he has his headset on," the lighting girls helpfully informed me.
"Could he please PUT it on??? A/v....A/v are you there??? SPEAK to me A/v"
"Errr...yea, I'm here. I heard you the first time."
(ggrrrrr...restrain myself...take deep breaths...inform again about need to acknowledge quickly)
"OK. Reggie, could you check the mikes on OP? Reggie? Reggie are you there?(fume....) Sound can you hear me????"
"Errr.......it's Max here"
"Max, are you on sound? (yes) Then why didn't you answer?"
"Well, you were talking to Reggie."
(deep breathing madly and speaking through gritted teeth) "Max, is Reggie on the desk???"
"No, I am."
"WELL HOW DID YOU EXPECT HIM TO ANSWER ME????????????????????"

Boys!!!!!!!!!

In fact, I think the A/v acknowledge me by nodding. I cannot count the number of times they haven't had their headsets on, or have heard me and not let me know. Frequently they ask for lengthy cues so they can get 'set up'............and then spectacularly fail to switch the machine on in time.....or switch it on so we can see the advert for the manufacturer. When asked why they are slow with their cues they seem irritated.
"Well, we're rather busy at the moment."
"Doing WHAT???"
"Renaming the clips."
"Could you possibly do that AFTER the show????"

I listed all the cues for A/v but foolishly I named them 1,2,3 etc. This confused them because the slides are also named 1,2,3. The fact that I have carefully described each cue eg
'Cue 5: Slide 6 off' does not seem to help them. They still put up slide 5 for cue 5.

Ah well. Tomorrow is another day and we have an 11am matinee performance for our feeder school 'Sunrise'. Wish us luck!!!!!!!!!!!