A Delayed Shopping Trip

"I've explained to the Small Boy how boys shop," my husband informed me just before Christmas. "We sit outside first and decide what we want, then we go in, go straight to the places we need and get what we want."

Uh-huh. There are a few gaping holes in this plan and I, being the loving wife I am was quick to point them out to Himself.


a) You will not necessarily get the best price by this method, nor even the best quality item.
b) What if the shop doesn't have it.
c) (and this is a bit of a girly one I have to admit) what if what you THINK you want isn't what
you want when you get in there and see the fabulous array of choices available???

Huh??
Huh???

But even this is insufficient explanation. You see darling husband, shopping is an interaction.

Today my mother and I went on the shopping trip I have been wanting to go on since she arrived. I had toyed briefly with the idea of doing this with her on my birthday until I realised I'd told her it was ok to go out to lunch with some of her old friends. Today we caught up on the missed experience.

There are many things which made this trip different from the frenzied buying sprees of the week before Christmas where she certainly accompanied me, and I her. For instance, there were just the two of us. We didn't really have a time limit. We had one or two small jobs to do but no grand mission.

Shopping is interaction dear husband. For example, today my mother and I learned what size we both now take. As a result of this we discussed exercise. We also discussed her experiences with a masseur and the benefits thereof!

We remembered that we had different tastes in things and that was ok! We agreed that the majority of current , disposable fashion looks like it is made out of dishcloths! We talked about her new cleaner (as a result of dishcloths) and I learned how she had found her and how Mum's back gives her so much trouble now that her cleaner comes mainly to push the vacuum cleaner which is too heavy for Mum.

During lunch we laughed over the poor quality of the 'wrap' she ordered and discussed our relative weight gains and need for healthy eating. As a result of that we started to talk about Himself's weight and health. As a result of that we started to talk about wills, estates and how our respective children would fare 'when the time comes'. What arrangements had we both made? What is the best way to make them? Who will be OK? Who will struggle? What would happen if Baby Angel was left on her own.....all tricky questions, essential for discussion and all difficult to 'bring up' artificially. They just come up naturally over lunch in the Mall.

In watching the interactions of parents and children we compared notes on parenting. She told me where she thought she went wrong. I told her how wonderful the years were I spent with her when I was a new mother. From there we discussed friends and their children and how they were all doing.

We went searching for a pair of earrings for me and got earrings and a necklace for her. We switched the subject of the search to a new silver cross for me and touched on matters of theology and faith as a result.

I drove her home although she insisted she could catch a bus (41C.....I think NOT) thus reinforcing her worth to me. I would not let her pay for petrol, establishing again my independence, adult status and desire to bless her by simply taking her home. We discussed the statement 'allow me to bless you' afterwards. More faith and theology.

We both agreed we had had a wonderful expedition. We had found out more about each other. We had underlined and reinforced important aspects of our relationship and got a couple of nice purchases as a a reminder of our trip.

Are there men who see shopping in this light? Is it a gender thing or a personality thing? Are we foolish in suggesting our men are missing out on something when they do not embrace the 'shopping trip'? Are there other ways men do this or is it simply that my beloved is one of a group who do not desire the underlining, reinforcing and even defining of relationships?

*sigh* I would appreciate any enlightenment you blokes can extend.
************************************************************************************
NB: Picture above shows Mum and I on Christmas Day (just before I collapsed into bed AGAIN) with her new shears.

"How the &$#@ am I supposed to get THESE in a suitcase to go home????"
(I patiently showed her the removable handles. Just don't put em in your hand luggage Ma)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Sports Update: Bad day on the waves but it was a strategic move. This will improve their handicap! Also a delightful friend (who is winning) will give them some rigging tips tomorrow!!