On A Happier Note

I recently received this from one of my ex pupils. She had been writing an essay on her Mathematical Journey for her Uni course....

"Through high school my anxieties developed into panic as my school placed an enormous emphasis on high level maths. Late in year nine a maths teacher started to understand that my abilities were limited due to the constant fear of failure and she took it upon herself to help me in any way she could. She began to tutor me every Tuesday after school for a couple of hours, working through the class work again and helping me with my homework. It was this teacher’s kindness, skill and patience that ensured my success with mathematics and I will forever be grateful to her. "

Nawwwwwwww. Well, at least I saved one starfish!

My Feet They Finally Took Root In The Earth

I have been trying to write this post for 9 days.I have lost the whole thing, fallen asleep in front of the computer  and run out of time to do anything.....so now, here is what I have squeezed out 9 days later...
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Some time ago I wrote about this guy. I wrote about him more than once and in December 2010 I had the very great privilege of attending his graduation ball. Here we all are.

Gene has renamed himself on facebook so I will use that moniker now. That's him, 'Al', on the right. Can you see why I love him? I don't feel so bad about posting this photo now, given that all the lads are over 18 and a pretty regular presence on the internet anyway. The other two gentlemen are also amazing men, with their own stories, but today I want to talk about Al.

After his graduation I connected with him on facebook and found out that he was doing a course in mechanics and expected to have an apprenticeship soon.We messaged each other occasionally and left comments. Then he went quiet.

The week before last, out of the blue, he contacted me. In the past I had always reminded him that I would be happy to help him in any way I could: study, references, course applications etc.
To my complete surprise (and delight) he suddenly popped up and said:
      "Hey Mrs A, I need you' help!"
I lost no time in replying:
       "Hey Al! Wass up? What do you need help with?"
       "Maths Mrs A. I want to learn everything. I'm ready now, I want to learn the basics and be able
         to do calculations and use formulas and stuff...."

Now any of you who have tutored will know that there is a significant per hour price tag attached to the assistance I was willing to give but as I prepared my response I knew that wasn't even in the equation.

        "No worries! What kind of things do you want to cover and where shall I meet you?"

We agreed to meet in the central library on Thursday night. I have got to admit I was anxious. I mean, it has been three years. What would he think when his sprightly, energetic maths teacher from 2010 turned out to be a middle aged pudding? Would it put him off study for ever? Seriously though, would he be committed? Would he even turn up?????

I was late as usual and then I found that the labyrinth of the library defeated me so I had to text him to come and rescue me from the foyer.

He came around the corner and I knew his shape from a distance.  Gone was the backward facing cap, baggy pants around his crutch and sleeveless singlets. Even the dubious symbols previously carved into his tight dark curls had gone. In their place was an attractive, respectable looking young man in a plaid shirt and slim fitting jeans with a conservative haircut and an air of purpose.

We sat and talked for a while. He was off that evening to graduate from his TAFE Course in Business Management.
"So you don't really need my help after all?"
"No, Mrs A, I really DO need your help. I want to do this..."
and he flipped over a folder he was carrying.....
He wants to learn to fly.
"I can do it Mrs A. I believe in myself now.  I don't care what I have to do. If I have to, I will go back to the beginning......"
"You may have to Al..."

He told me where he'd 'been' and what he'd been through. He told me of bad trips and seeing things he never wanted to see again. He told me of holing up in his mum's house and refusing to see his 'friends'; he told me about needing to separate himself from the culture and how his mother helped him keep the toxic friends away....

He told me about how he had found God.
 I smiled broadly.
"Yeah Mrs A, I knew you would like that," he said.
"Cool," was all I could offer. :-)

He had to leave to get to his graduation ceremony but I was so pumped after seeing him  I didn't know what to do with myself, so I went to the pub.
It was completely empty.

I sat with myself and thought about a lot of things. I thought about the last time I had been in that pub, maybe thirty years ago. I thought about how much it (and I) had changed. I thought about what I had wanted to do with my life 30 years ago and I thought about how that had changed and what I had contributed to Al's life.

Life is such a convoluted thing. My own weird journey, my regrets, my disappointments, I looked at them all through the lens of Al. I sat in that empty pub and downed pint  with a quiet sense of euphoria. Maybe, for once, I had made a difference.

God bless you Al. I know our journey will not be predictable, after all you didn't turn up this week while I sat there and waited, but I know God put us  together for  reason. I don't even know if my level of maths will be sufficient for the road you have set ahead for you but if not I will find you an appropriate tutor. Don't you worry about that!

I can't tell you how excited I am to be on this journey with you.

Love ya Al. In a nice, 'not creepy' kind of way ;-)


Growin Up : Bruce Springsteen

Affirmations

Another note in a Christmas card, this time from one of the Year 12 boys in my Care Group. I am recording this here so I can look back on it when I am up to my eyeballs in frustration :-)

Dear Mrs A

It's been quite entertaining having you for a Care Group teacher as I appreciate your sense of humour, even if most people don't know that you're making a joke at the time. Having short discussions with you about Creation vs Evolution has also been quite interesting, even if we must agree to disagree in the end. I can tell that you are quite passionate about Jesus and your beliefs and your love for him does actually radiate from you. (awww bless his cotton socks.......) Finishing this with another seemingly disjointed sentence is what I must do now as I wish you a Merry Christmas , a happy New Year and many years of prosperity to come.


Gotta love 'em eh?

Well Done Good and Faithful Servant

Thank you God for this, my favourite Christmas present, received as a message on Facebook this morning:

Hey mrs a
just thought id say goodbye since i didnt get to at presentation night because i didnt go...
Thanks for everything youve done for me and my maths class. I know it wouldve been hard to persist and i admire your patience and commitment. You are the most committed teacher i had this year and now that i think of it, youre one of the most committed teachers ive had at any highschool.
Thank you for your guidance, teaching, committment, patience, helpfulness and the passion and willingness to help us all.
All though a lot of the students in the class didnt recognise and appreciate what youve done this year, i do, and i thank you immensley for your help and teaching...i actually did well this year!
Maths is the subject i struggle most with and usually give up on easily but you helped me and taught me in a way i could understand and when i didnt (understand) you explained it further til i did.
You will be greatly missed next year and i hope you are given the respect you diserve where ever you go next year because i know you didnt get it from everyone this year.
So thank you goodbye and goodluck!:):):)
xoxo

....Even One Starfish*

I have had a number of difficult students this year. One has been on the edge of 'departing' so many times that the parents have decided another school may be the best option, before it is a necessity! That same pupil has argued with me, confronted me, ignored me, accused me (you never help me) and generally made life draining for the last 11 months. On the last day I received this

Dear Mrs A

I really wanted to thank you for how much you have helped me in the past year. I have learnt so much from you not only in Science and Maths but I have also learnt that teachers do care! other teachers may care but you are the only teacher I have ever felt cares about me and my future! I appreciate that more than you know, it has really helped me get through school a lot easier! Even though I was sometimes naughty and disruptive you always stuck by me and reminded me that you truly do care for my future so I should too! I appreciate that more than anything!

God bless and keep safe


And THAT ladies and gentlemen...is why we continue to go to work each day.

*For the Starfish reference

Starfish Moments

Sometimes in teaching you have 'starfish' moments.

Many years ago I attended a course on 'Protective Behaviours' which is about teaching children to recognise 'unsafe' behaviour in adults and thus prevent abuse, particularly sexual abuse. It was a weekend residential and probably one of the most profound and confronting courses I have undertaken.

During the last day, there was much discussion about the statistics and how effective education is etc etc etc. The lecturer told a story.

Once a man was walking along the beach at low tide, picking up the stranded starfish on the beach and throwing them back into the waves. A small boy approached him and began mocking him.
"What are you doing old man? You know the sea will continue to retreat and those starfish will be stranded again in no time. You're wasting your time!!"
"Ah", said the old man," But if I save one starfish."

This story has stayed with me.

When I worked exclusively with Special Needs students I was constantly asked why I 'bothered' by other teachers. They had seen these kids, they knew what we were up against and they also knew with the Govt funding and levels of support, we only scratched at the iceberg. I always told them about the starfish.

The thing about Special Ed is that you often don't get to see the full grown starfish. They move on and leave your care and enter new systems ........
Once, years later, in the UK a lad I had spent a LOT of time on came to a school function and loked at me with an air of recognition.
"I remember you", he said,"You taught me to read."

For him it had been a lifetime ago. For me it was a mere three years.

Now that I am struggling with mainstream teaching and teenagers to boot (OK Lord, you've made your point) I get less and less of the 'starfish' moments. Rather than 1 to 1 I have 26 kids to deal with- and they are mostly out to get me :-D

Last term I took over a Year 9 English class from a teacher they loved who had given up her time due to family pressures. Naturally this was my fault and the class punished me accordingly.

As a class we eventually came to some working arrangement but as always there were a few 'hard nuts'. One was a tall, striking girl named G with an irreverent attitude and an inability(?) to complete or at least hand up work. When she wasn't being sent out for talking (or being given a massage by the boy behind her) she actually made rather perceptive contributions to class discussion. But still, no work.

Towards the end of the term I sensed a change. She was still disinterested in class (mainly) but she approached me about getting a 'late' assignment in and true to her word she managed it. She accompanied it with a letter.

I'm really sorry for taking so long to hand this in to you. I keep on forgetting to either bring it to school or sticking the quotes on, but finally, here it is! Thanks for being patient. I hope you can still mark it so I don't completely fail English.
Also, I'm heaps sorry for being such a handfull (sic) so far this year. It's just that you rmind me so much of a woman that I haven't had a great experience with a few years back and it's really hard for me to look at you without being reminded of her which really sucks because I know that you're a really good teacher and I honestly do want to learn so I'm going to try and be better I promise.... I'm not really that bad of a student :-D (I hoped you liked that run-on sentence and my heaps bad grammar!!) haha
Anyway I'll see you next term. Have some great holidays and some really long sleep-ins.
heart Georgia

Today we had our first lesson back. We have to do Shakespeare. We watched a bit of 'Much Ado About Nothing' and afterwards she came up to me and said "Mrs A, can we please do sonnets? I LOVE sonnets. They are so romantic. I don't understand them much but they sound great! I particularly love no 119"

I do not know sonnet 119. (who am I kidding. I don't know sonnets 1-118 either!!)

Some days I really love teaching.