Behind the Barricades

Recently, whilst looking back over posts to find a picture I'd lost in the tangle of changing machines and corrupted external drives, I found this post.

It made me sad because I used to be quite funny.

Sure my job was a nightmare and my stress levels through the roof, but I was observing things with a keen eye and I hadn't lost my sense of humour. Now, as I look back over the last few months here at The Sword, I see superficial posts with a hat tip to reality and with dwindling attempts at humour and insight. Of course, it's indicative of where we are in life but it still makes me sad. Hell, I wouldn't want to read me.

So, in an effort to clamber over the roughly proportionate brick walls of malaise and life demands which tower threateningly over  my creativity and humour, I'm going to fill you in, as tactfully as possible, on the recent vagaries of life at The Sword although, to be honest, it isn't tact that's stopped me writing around here; I was never overly blessed with tact. :-)

A number of things have happened recently, some good, some bad, some a little ambiguous (we shall see how they turn out). Himself and I are struggling with health issues, No 2 Son is unemployed again, Small Boy doesn't come by any more and the Baby Angel is in the throes of her final year at school. Even without recent events, we have out hands full.

The good thing that's happened is that Himself's uncle has left us what looks to be a sizeable legacy. The bad thing is that the two of us now have to agree on how to use it! I would like to reduce our mortgage as much as possible, as well as replace that retaining wall which has been causing us grief for some years now.
Himself would like to put a sizeable chunk of it into the business. *Sigh*
Business is the big issue of course. Being self employed in this economic climate is not a comfortable thing. Of course, as the economy bunny hops along, people want websites to promote their business and whilst there is no problem in attracting the clients,  many don't actually have the readies with which to pay, at least not within our '14 day payment' terms. This leaves us with cash flow issues and naturally when there's not enough to go around, it's the Boss who misses out.We seem to have been standing still financially for as long as Himself and I have been together. So whilst Himself sees the inheritance as an opportunity to invest in the business, I see it as throwing wads of bank notes into a black hole.

The ambiguous thing is that Himself's business partner sauntered into the office a month or so ago and announced he was moving to the UK. Has had already sold his house. With a creative partnership stretching back nearly 15 years, Himself was gutted by the bombshell delivery of the news.

I suppose we should have seen it coming. With the employment of a couple of super hot young programmers in the last few years Business Partner, as the technical arm of the partnership, has been feeling more and more inadequate and disempowered. Add to this the fact that his wife wants to live in a cooler climate and his son to attend a european university and it was really only a matter of time. I guess we just wished he had discussed it before it became a fait accompli.

Naturally, this has produced a flurry of restructuring, not the least of which was our recent sojourn to Kangaroo Island for a 'Restructuring Workshop'.

The remaining 'gang' gathered at our favourite island resort to see how roles could be re-organised and tasks re-allocated. It was good to do this away from the somewhat claustrophobic confines of the office and the continual interruption of phone and emails.

This:

Versus:

The interesting thing about the whole exercise is that it included me. Up until now I have had a fairly remote input into Himself's business activities. I have provided voice-overs, proof read content, tested new sites and occasionally collated print materials but I have not been involved in the day to day running of the office or in the strategic nature of the business. With the departure of BP this looks set to change.

Himself ran a very tight workshop over the one and a half days. I minuted, drew up a framework of aims, goals and objectives and helped to run through the 'who' and 'when' of an Action Plan. Apparently they thought I did a wonderful job because they also want me to come into the office on my one day a week off to chase payments, pay accounts and organise the filing system!

I am not sure how I feel about this.

*********************

Also behind the barricade of doom and gloom are our health issues which are at once debilitating, depressing and expensive. Mine of course is the old shoulder problem which has surprisingly lain dormant for three and a half years. On re-reading this post I am shocked by how similar my symptoms are to this time, but how quickly they were cured by an injection last time. According to latest ultra sounds, I now have a full thickness tear of the tendon although, unlike in this picture, mine is probably more towards the front of the supraspinatus. It was sustained in the incident I described here although, it is likely that I had a pre-existing superficial tear (even though I can't remember any specific trauma) which has just ripped right through. Whatever the pathology of the thing, it ain't going to go away by itself and impacts on my ability to do many of the heavier manual tasks about the place that seem to fall to me. Strangely, it is my sleep which is most affected.

Lying still in one position for any length of time seems to cause nerve irritation and I am waking up in the early hours with intense burning pain down the front of my arm. Ack. Talking about it is enough to bring the shadow of those twin brick walls back over my head. My immediate inclination, right now, is to stop writing, get a large glass of wine and do something vaguely organisational like, oh I don't know, re-arranging deckchairs on the Titanic.

Himself is suffering with major dental issues which affect his quality of life and, like all dental issues, threaten to be hugely expensive. He wants to go the cheap route but I don't want to be married to someone with full dentures! :-( Bear this in mind any of you who still struggle with smoking. It is another aspect of the revolting habit which will come to plague you in later life!!

Stepsons are my other heartache. As briefly as possible I will mention some of these issues, as they do impact on me, although I know they are not actually my issues to discuss. No 1 Son is traveling a very dark path at present with addictions, money problems and even physical threats to his safety. He has been out on his own for 5 years now so we only see and hear about these things as the situation deteriorates. Himself is determined that No1 Son's problems will not impact upon the others.
No 2 Son is still living downstairs in his 'Pit' and we have some hope for him, if he could only get a direction in life. He is unemployed again at present and lacks the resilience to hammer on doors and flood businesses with his 'resume'. I feel strongly that if he could just find his passion and be given a break, he would blossom. OK it may turn out that he's more of a Patterson's Curse  than a Forget-Me-Not but hey! there's nothing like a big field of blue in the Spring. He often has good intentions.
Small Boy is breaking all our hearts at present. He has started High School and has simultaneously decided that he has better things to do than spend the weekend with a busy dad and two boring girls (The BA and I). In some ways, it is to be expected that his life will revolve less and less around the family, as indeed has been the case for the BA as she stretches her social wings; but I was just not expecting it so soon. And I strongly feel that his parents could be making more of a stand. And his first secondary school report reflects the state of play.

So that briefly (hah!) is life here behind the Barricades. I am hoping to recover my humour and energy and start writing, I mean really writing, again. I'm just not quite sure how to go about it.

The Inheritance To Do List

On the sad but not unexpected demise of Himself's Fairy Godmother (she was 94), we have come into a little money. Here is what we would like to do with it....

The Back Garden

• replace retaining wall

• add useable terraces

• repair/replace damaged paving around the pool

• replace and re-site all pool 'workings'

• replace/repair guttering

The Inside of The House

• replace flooring to study, front room, hall, stairs and possibly entrance hall.

• install gas heating to front room and study

• install a flue over the cook top

• replace lighting in kitchen adding bench lighting

• replace lighting in study and front room.

Here is what we have done so far:





Yes that is another boat in the background.
You can award me my halo or print 'Welcome' across my forehead anytime you like now.
You choose.

And Now For My Next Trick, I Will Fit 5 Employees into the Same Timetable!!!!

We have been in the throes of some major changes on the work front. Towards the end of last term, three girls with very little English applied to enrol at the school. They brought with them, $6000 worth of 'New Arrivals' funding which we are to use to give them intensive English lessons. With the incorporation of their 5 lessons a week into our already overloaded support timetable, I was faced with finding other staff members to fill the gaps. One has doubled her hours and another, a visiting tutor, has been put on 4 days a week! But that's not all!

In addition to our new ESL girls, we have a new little Autistic boy in Reception and a change in focus for our Down Syndrome girl. In summary, we have basically had to throw the timetable in the air and start again. It's been quite a jigsaw puzzle; although maybe more like one of those alphabet puzzles where you've got one free space and you have to move all the tiles around, one space at a time, to get them into alphabetical order!!

Our timetable is now so complicated one almost needs special glasses to view it!

With all this going on, we are still looking for a beefy male type to be on duty around our 'Oppositional Defiance Disordered' child, who is on reduced enrolment after having thwacked the teacher over the head with a pencil case. We thought we had the ideal guy: a nuggety Kiwi with a background working for a national football association training kids in schools, he was gentle yet intimidating. Unfortunately, after 2 weeks, he pulled the plug citing over commitment and demands of family. We were gutted.

Yesterday, we had a behavioural specialist in to observe said child (let's call him Gabriel). There was a relief teacher on the class which amped his behaviour up several notches and the specialist came out of the observation shocked and disturbed! She claimed he was the 'most severe' child she had ever observed!

Excellent.

As a staff we are being challenged daily by these kids who want to be in control. Whether they be autistic, abused or indulged, their agenda is identical. It's all about trying to get their hands on the Flaming Sword and, I gotta tell ya people, we can NOT afford to give it to them. This does not always make us popular. The mother of our newest autistic boy burst into tears as she saw him shouting and screaming at home time today. He didn't want to go home.
"Thanks for ruining my child" she spat at the astonished teacher, who had to walk the child to the car as he wouldn't go with mum.....

Kids do not really want to be in control.

In the meantime, we have come into some $$$$$$$$$! Well, more like $$$$$
I am going crazy ordering plumbers and carpenters, electricians and landscape designers. There is the small disappointment that Himself spent 20% of the inheritance buying a new boat and trailer!!! Cos we really needed a second boat!!!!! But I have decided not to let it bug me. On the other hand, I can't get overly excited either....:-(

It's Managing Director or Nothing!

"That's Sarah, who works with me, over there Mum and guess what? She's going in to work tonight and she's going to QUIT!!!" announced the Baby Angel with some fervour on Friday night. "And Zac? He's quitting too. And Mum, you KNOW how much I hate my job! You know how STRESSED I get about it!!"

"What's your point BA?"

"Well I think maybe I should quit too."

(Mother pauses to take a deep breath, don't blow this now mother, just the right amount of indignation mixed with a soupcon of sympathy and a firm line.......)

"I see, well, I suspect you should make sure you've got another job before you quit this one," I reflected in measured tones.
"But I'll never get another job! Do you know how many people are out there looking for jobs???" she wailed in response.
"Exactly. Be very grateful you have a job (and 'suck it up Princess' I refrained from adding)."

Lately we have been having discussions about money. Her latest bank statement showed that she had spent rather more than she'd realised in the last 3 months. She is trying to save for this trip to Vanuatu with the Church Youth Group and, thus far, her weekly stint at the Golden Arches is not providing her with the saving and the spending she desires. At least, it provides her with the spending, but at the expense of the saving. When trying to determine where all this money had gone, she had to admit that she was frittering it away on junk food and so forth on trips to the mall with friends.
"But," she exclaimed in outrage,"the others all have money from their parents! It's not fair!!!!"

Now this is true. Ever since an unfortunate incident with her bedroom door a couple of years ago, I have stopped giving the BA pocket money. In the first instance it was to pay for repair of the door, but somehow it never really got going again and now that she works, I don't see the need to supplement her income with 'spending money' every time she wants to go into town with her friends. So, the question is, am I being too harsh?

I don't think I am. She has many things provided for her: I buy all her toiletries and basic clothing necessities (socks and the like) whilst her dad and step mum buy her bags of clothes every time she visits; I pay for her music tuition, her netball fees and transport to school each week; I somehow manage to make most concerts or gigs into birthday or Christmas presents. If we go to the movies I pay.

I do not pay for phone credit or socialising. Nowadays she buys presents for her friends on their birthdays as well, an item which used to be my domain.

I think this is fair.

If I start forking over 'spare change' every time she feels the need to meet friends at the food court or buy a teen magazine, the message goes out that everything comes easily and there is no need to monitor or regulate the amount you are spending on these 'extras'. I think this would be doing her a disservice. The difficulty, of course, is when other parents do not share these values.

Of course, it is completely up to each family to decide which expenses they will bear for their emergent adults and which they will leave to the teen; but please folks, leave something to them! Aside from the financial learning they will experience and the money you will save, you reward them with a sense of responsibility and control, essential for their healthy development. If parents are continually providing cash, young people begin to believe that they are not capable of doing it themselves.

And so BA, no, you may not 'quit' your job simply because you 'don't really like it that much'. Welcome to the real world! And anyway, part of the reason you work at Maccas when you are 15 is to remind you what you are studying for!!!

Here endeth the lesson.

Edited to add:

Jill made a comment which prompted me to clarify something. Part time jobs are definitely NOT meant to interfere with school work! If this is the case then it is time to quit the job until something more suitable comes along. My part time job as a teen was Thursday nights til 9pm and Saturday mornings at the local supermarket. This left plenty of time to keep up with study and assignments. The Baby Angel works one LOOOOOOOng shift at Maccas on a Sunday, usually 8am until 3pm which still leaves time for homework in the evening (should it not have been completed before this....which it should have!).

My main point with the BA's recent desire to quit was that it was based on her general disinterest in the job and more particularly, dislike of one of the supervisors. Whilst these things are certainly reasons to look elsewhere for employment, the danger with youth today is that Mum and Dad will 'bail them out' and they never have to learn to deal with the unpleasantness of life, like long hours and bad tempered bosses.


image credit

2405

What is that number I hear you ask? Well, apparently, it is the number of litres of water our household is using per day! According to SA Water's enormous, but very helpful bill, we are using more than twice the average amount for a family of 5+ with a large garden. They also suggest that since our water use has tripled from the same period last year, we may like to visit a site called www.sawater.com.au for some water saving tips.

HELLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Water saving tips?????????

I think we have a leak >:-(

A quick feel of the soil around our water meter confirmed this. I have now removed the bush which the Water Board refuses to brush aside and called the Leak Line.

Now to take out an extension to our mortgage to pay the bill.
>:-(

The Hollow Sound of Bankers' Laughter

Have you ever tried to redeem points on a credit card loyalty scheme? I have a theory about this. I suspect there are 4 dusty reward items, nailed to the floor in some window display. They are photographed, occasionally updated and never leave the building. There are no other items waiting for redemption! There is no happy rack of sparkling cordless phones; no cupboards full of steak knives and plasma TVs, NO! the whole thing is an elaborate front to encourage you to keep using your credit card to pay for everything!!!!!!

I know this because in the last two years we have tried unsuccessfully to redeem points, on a relatively low point item I might add, via a website. In the first instance we couldn't even log into the blasted thing. Then, after Himself rang and shouted obscenities at the recorded prompts, he spoke to an operator who assured him the site was about to be updated and gave us a temporary password. We duly logged in and went to 'look' at the items available for redemption (as per the mailed out catalogue). We selected the one we wanted and clicked. Nothing. And again. Nothing.
Another phone call assured us that it was a glitch that was being sorted. We didn't bother for a while.

Tonight we tried again. The website is brand new and shiny! I had to create a totally new username etc but we got in and navigated to the 'redeem points' page. There were three overpriced items on the homepage, all with clickable links. That was all there was; no button directing you to the catalogue; no neatly arranged photos of the other items in question. But wait! On the side bar there is an animated marquee with alternating pics of all other redeemable items. There is a button exhorting you to 'redeem now'.

Firstly you wonder if you have to wait til your desired item flashes up before you click 'redeem now'. Wait, wait, wait....there it is! Click now! Go on, go on.......CLICK!!!!!!!!!!!
Drat. Missed it.
Then you figure it can't be that hard and just click on any picture. And click. And CLICK. The download bar lights up, the page reads 'done'. It is unchanged.

Someone, somewhere in their little programmers' hole is having a HUGE laugh!!!!!!!!!!!