Words of Wisdom

Youth is wasted on the young.

Tuesday, 24 June 2014

Open Letter To My (Nearly) Adult Daughter

You are old enough to vote
To drive a car
To fork out tax
To earn a wage
To get a loan
To plan a trip across Europe and  complete it without parental intervention.

Spot the discrepancy in this list.

Do you know, I've been where you are now?

My mother never has been.
At your age, her neatly mitred conservative life was leading her to the ultimate production of your mother and aunts, in a foreign country, eons away from the support she needed to confidently rear us.
The idea of randomly travelling, having adventure, living it up......anathema.
Your grandmother was born a few years prior to World War II. Her whole psyche was shaped by that conflict and the austerity that accompanied and followed it. It does not make her right or wrong. it just makes her who she is. And she loves us.

I have been where you are, though.
I remember the excitement, the magic, the sense of adventure. I remember the feeling that the world was my oyster. I remember feeling that my job was to taste as much as I could...
And  in the end I remember that I felt bloated but not necessarily satisfied.

My glorious daughter, you are walking a very fine line. Remember our genes, remember the danger that lies in the casual bottle. Remember the obligation of your intellect, your affluence.  Remember also the joys that these things bring.



Anonymous said...

You really do write very well, CN. I wonder if most people who have been "successful poachers turned gamekeeper" have perennial nightmares about their children following too closely in their footsteps?

Arizaphale said...

I suspect so!

dawn marie giegerich said...

When I was the age your daughter is I had very little interest in parental advice. I wanted to marry the man that I was pregnant by and when my father asked, "are you sure this is the one?" I said, "but Dad I LO-O-OVE him." "It'll take more than love," he answered. And I felt sorry for this old, old man who did not understand the dance of love. From what I have read, your daughter is smarter.

Angel Leo Lin said...

A great piece indeed , sometimes parents and their ( adult children ) just need to talk to each other out of their heart .

BrightenedBoy said...

Sage advice. I hope everything is all right.